635: This is America

Explanation
This comic translates all the text in the original comic using Yandex Translate. In the original comic, Orson is reading Goldilocks to Booker and Sheldon, only for everyone else to interrupt the story with what they think happened next. In addition to the dialogue, the strip's title (originally "US Acres") and signature (originally "Jim Davis 5-11") have been translated.

The description states that this was a response to Square Root of Minus Garfield and its Badly Translated series, which got less funny and more exact over time as machine translation improved. Thus, they use a different translation program and a different comic to see if the results are noticeably different. In the end, it seems that it does; much of the script does not match the original text. It's also worth pointing out that, considering her grouchy and competitive personality, "depression and pain" is very in-character for Lanolin either way.

The author writes
On SRoMG, a common trend is to put the text of a comic through Google Translate, and then edit the mangled text back into the comic. As machine translation has become more advanced, the scripts barely change anymore. Compare 2011's Badly Translated Garfield to 2021's Googlefield Part 1.

So, if we don't use Garfield and don't use Google Translate (I opted for Yandex, and used its in-beta languages), this happens. Maybe it's better, maybe it's worse. Who's to say?

Original US Acres strip: 1988-05-11.

Transcript
Orson: {reading a book} "This flower is beautiful," Goldlock said. "Pumpkins are so delicious!" Orson: What did Goldlock think you were doing? Roy: Sweet cat! Lanolin: Depression and Pain Wade: Sounds amazing! Bo: Photo Booker: He still has a mouth, hot! Sheldon: Next! Orson: It happened